Approaching the discussion about sex with adolescents

Approaching the discussion about sex with adolescents


As adolescents enter puberty, they begin to meet more often with a partner of the opposite sex and many of them become sexually active. For many of them, sexual impulses are most intense during adolescence. More than half of adolescents began their sexual life by the age of 17. By the age of 18, 65% of girls and 68% of boys started having sex.

The parents approach the discussions about sex with their own children

Whether they are sexually active or not, adolescents need support to make responsible decisions about sex. Discussions about sex do not encourage sexual activity among adolescents; In fact, some studies show that an open and honest discussion about sex, can prevent unwanted pregnancies in adolescents, or even delay the onset of sex life.

Conducting an open, honest discussion with the adolescent will largely depend on the parent-adolescent relationship built up to that point. Ideally, discussions about sex should begin while the teenager is in high school. A good way to start a discussion about sex is to first admit that a conversation about sex can be uncomfortable, but the teen should not be afraid to ask questions. However, discussions with adolescents about sex and sexuality should not be singular. As they grow or mature, children normally ask questions about sexuality. The better they can be guided, the better they will be prepared to make responsible decisions. If you are unsettled to start such a discussion, use as an example a situation in your daily life to break the ice. Examples can be used from the TV or the example of an accidental pregnancy in a teenage girl to open up a conversation about sex or dating.

Your own library, church, other clerical institutions or various organizations can be a source of helpful information in discussions with children about sex or other family issues. The organizations offer both for teenagers and for parents, counseling and courses on sex, dating and other important issues.


Discussions about condoms or other forms of contraception are often based on family principles and attitude. However, it is essential to ensure that adolescents understand how to avoid sexually transmitted diseases, how to get pregnant, how to avoid unwanted pregnancy, abstinence or using condoms and other forms of contraception.

Sexual abuse and rape

Giving the teen information about rape is important. One in four high school girls or one in ten high school boys report a history of physical or sexual abuse. The experience of sexual abuse exposes the teenager to an increased risk of sexual or physical abuse at a meeting.

The following is recommended for the adolescent:

  • to avoid remote (isolated) places
  • to choose populated places, where the adolescent feels comfortable and safe; not to choose the domicile of one of the parties as a meeting place; these are the most familiar places where rapes occur
  • to trust instinct: if there is a feeling of vulnerability, it can be founded; for example, avoid parties where boys are larger than girls
  • do not hesitate to be rude: if the meeting degenerates or the teenager feels agitated, it is recommended to confront the immediate partner or leave the place as soon as possible
  • avoid alcohol or drugs: they compromise the ability and responsible decision making during the meeting
  • to resort to double or group meetings: especially for the first time, a group meeting may be more comfortable or less risky; When teenagers are in the company of trusted friends, they tend to feel safe even if they break rules.
    Source: Sfatulmedicului.ro