Sexuality and differences between boy and girl will be two of the topics on which your child will show his curiosity since he was very young. Early discussion of the differences between the sexes helps him establish his sexual identity faster and easier. This is not a very easy topic to discuss with a child of just a few years. We offer you some valuable information and tips on how to have a relaxed and constructive discussion with him on this topic!
The right age for discussing gender differences
Since he is a baby and begins to explore and discover his own genitals, it is the right time to start learning the difference between the sexes. At very young ages, he will not understand much. But by constantly explaining to him what his intimate parts are and how he differs from the other sex, you create the basis for the discussion later, from preschool age, when the little boy should establish his own sexual identity.
Up to 3 years, the child does not differentiate between the two sexes and cannot be identified as belonging to one or the other gender. He will choose and like things, clothes and toys belonging to both sexes. It is only at preschool age that you begin to notice that there is a difference between one sex and another, studying the different behaviors and choices that moms and dads make.
But the differences between the sexes cannot be defined only by the behavioral model of each sex. Much of the child's understanding of this difference depends on how you explain the differences between the sexual organs of each gender.
The child is ready for this delicate discussion between 5 and 7 years. At this stage of childhood, the child must already have established his or her sexual identity and be aware that he is a boy or a girl. It's time you get to understand even more what are the particularities of each gender!
How do you talk to the child about the sexual organs of each gender?
In the first phase, you will have to talk with the child about the characteristics of the sex to which he belongs. But not long after that, you will have delicate questions to ask about the intimate organs of the opposite sex.
Curiosities of the type "mommy, why boys have penis" or "why girls have breasts and boys do not?" they are natural in the development of the child. They contribute to the discovery of their own sexual identity, but they also help to get to know others better. Be prepared to answer everything, as far as it goes.
Discussion with the child about male sexual organs
If you have a boy, it is important to clarify and help him to understand what his genital apparatus is formed and what his characteristics are compared to that of the girls. You may have told him about his sexual organs in the past, when he was a baby and he was touching the genital area or when you told him about the need for intimacy and the intimate space of each person.
Now is the time to put the point "i" and have a little anatomy lesson with him, which will help him understand even better the difference between him and a girl. Ask him if he knows what the intimate or genital parts of a boy are. Point him to the penis and ask him what it is. If he knows, he will answer, if not, make it clear and concise that it is a penis. Do not give him another name and do not try to mask him in funny terms. Be as explicit as possible.
Explain to him that the penis is the specific male organ, with which he pisses. Tell him that the two sacs that hang near the penis are testicles and that when he grows bigger, at 11-12 years old, they will be filled with sperm, which will be carried through the penis outwards.
Tell him that sperm is used to conceive a baby at maturity. You don't need to go into too much detail, because you won't be able to understand much. It is enough to know that men have penises and testicles and what they use.
Discussion with the child about female sexual organs
If you have a baby girl, it is important to have a discussion about the sexual characteristics of the female gender. It's a bit more difficult discussion than the boys, the girls having a much more complex reproductive system.
There is no need for very detailed details. Explain to your little girl that the intimate area of the little girls is formed, on the outside, from the vagina, clitoris, labia and urethra. Eventually, show her what these parts are even on her own body and explain to her what each function is: the urethra is the one through which she pees, and the vagina is the one through which menstruation will come to her at puberty and which will help her to have it , at one point, children.
At the age of 7 anisors, he can also understand that the reproductive tract is still made up of an unseen part, composed of ovaries, uterus, cervix and uterine tubes. Explain to him what is the circuit that has an ovary egg monthly, when it is fertilized and when not.
Tell her that a special physical characteristic of the little girls is the breasts. Explain to them that they have the role of producing milk for when you have a baby.
Discussion with the child about the opposite sex
Discussion of the particularities of the opposite gender is essential for a better understanding of the child's own gender and gender difference. Even if you find it embarrassing or uncomfortable, it is important to be aware that the child's questions are not vulgar and do not show a sexual interest.
Through these questions, the child not only satisfies his curiosity and learns more about those around him, but such information contributes to a better understanding of how his own body works and how it differs from that of the opposite sex. It is advisable to talk to him about the genitals and characteristics of the opposite sex as if you were talking about his.
It is important to know how to differentiate yourself from the other sex and, in this way, to prevent the little one from resorting to embarrassing and un-recommended methods to satisfy his curiosity, of the type "I show you mine, if you show me you and yours, "in interactions with children of the opposite sex.
Have you talked to the child about the gender difference? Tell us your opinions in the comments section below!
Tags Child sexual identity Children sexuality Discussion child sexuality